Saturday, December 5, 2009

Miracle! Miracle!! Miracle on my blog!!!

A miracle has happened on my blog!

An over twenty five, yes, 25, yes, yes, yes, XXV years old message (click) from the Lord has suddenly emerged on my blog. Yes, the very same Lord who does not exist!

I always knew I was special; I was the chosen one.

Go! Spreadeth the wo... Oops! Spread the word!

10 comments:

  1. I thought you were supposed to be busy with studies !!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I had to struggle to read; finally copied to notepad and adjusted accordingly. By the way; whats wrong?

    ReplyDelete
  3. @ Stupidosaur:

    I'm actually a capricornian, and am actually 24 years as of now, so basically God hasn't lied about the particulars of my birth. Probably, you might have not seen the exact date of the Lord's message. ;)

    @ Rakesh:

    Time and tide wait for none. And the Lord's messages don't wait even for time and tide! ;)

    @ Newbie Mommy:

    "Ketan kid"? I was born more than 24 years ago!!!

    If alright = normal = average, how could I be alright? I'm the chosen one; I'm special, right? :P

    ReplyDelete
  4. @ Insignia:

    The Lord has used the most accurate and purest form of language in His/Her communication with us, so obviously because of its inherent purity, we find it difficult to understand.

    Here is the simplified transcript of His/Her message that I could understand. Remember, my interpretation could be wrong considering I'm a sinning mere mortal.

    .........

    Unknown to you (ye = plural form of 'you') blithely ignorant peoples, exactly a year from this wretched day shall cometh a blessed day, when a messiah (click, you moron) ['thee' = singular form of 'you'] shall take birth among you mortals.

    He will look every part a mortal like you. He will perform miracles that you will take for granted, just like the oxygen you shall breathe that He only would invent before taking birth.

    Whatever the worldly name He chooses to distract you from diagnosing His greatness, He in the Heavens, shall be known as The Bullosopher. He shall pretend to not believeth in My Existence, and spreadeth the word against Me, for the supply of the uplifting wonder pill - Nirvangra has been kept scarce, but it is for you to see through His distracting stratagems.

    He shall fill the World with light and delight. But these gifts shall come only to those mortals, who decipher the cryptic messages enshrined in His instruction manual that shall be called Neglected Serendipity.

    Your Lord, in His/Her Infinite Wisdom (TM) has set the Universe to self-destruct in the Twenty Seventh year of the Bullosopher (click again, you imbecile) [year of birth of the Bullosopher --> 1985 + 27 = year 2012 AD (anno domini = year of the Lord)]. Only thy Bullosopher can save ye.

    And to keep Him engaged in his Noblest pursuits, you shall sing a unique paean to his greatness - "To errrrrrrr is Human; to bullosophy is Bullosopherrrrrrrr".

    You see grammatical errors in The Message (TM)? Shut up, you mere mortal, for your Lord only invented the Grammar in His/Her Infinite Wisdom (TM). The bottomline being, Your Lord knows the Best.

    There shall not be nor there has been any other communication from your Lord. Any other communication shall only be enticements sent by The Axis of Evil Impostors.

    Arrghmen!

    .........

    Hope, the Lord's message is clearer now. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh my dear Lawwrdd, he's lost it! He's lost his senses, Ketan kid? :D

    B

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh oh its not that I didnt understand. I have read The Holy Bible :-)

    So it was not at all difficult to comprehend what you wrote. I was just wondering what was genuinely wrong with you :-)

    ReplyDelete
  7. NM,

    *raises both thumbs*

    Ketan,

    Eh?
    I didn't get anything.

    ReplyDelete
  8. @ Newbie Mommy:

    From your comment I'm confused if:

    1. You're lamenting to/asking Lawwrdd that/if Ketan kid has lost 'it'

    OR

    2. You're lamenting to/asking Ketan kid that/if Lawwrdd has lost 'it'?

    In either case who are Lawwrdd and Ketan kid? ;)

    @ Insignia:

    "Oh oh its not that I didnt understand. I have read The Holy Bible :-)"

    Well, I've not read the Holy Bible. So now, I'm confused. :( Anyway, I have read the entire The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge (click). See, if that helps! ;)

    "I was just wondering what was genuinely wrong with you :-)"

    Well, you're reaching close to diagnosing the greatness of the Bullosopher!! ;)

    If you're genuinely interested in knowing what's 'wrong', there's a link I've provided under the title 'influences' in my left sidebar. It will lead you to an eBook that you can download legally for free.

    TC.

    @ Srishti:

    Never mind, you're too young to start thinking about Nirvangra and all that! :P

    Ask Newbie Mommy (the one who you just showed two thengaas), who seems to have understood everything! ;)

    Or maybe, my first comment to Insignia above might help. :)

    ReplyDelete

Well-articulated disagreement would be a very good indicator that I was understood, and would be appreciated more than perfunctory agreement or praise. But of course, you could agree and praise...

Important disclaimer: The views expressed in comments by visitors to this blog do not necessarily enjoy my endorsement. Though I believe, practically, the comments' space of this blog belongs entirely to the readers and that I must not regulate it, I might delete comments that are insulting to other people, or if they are of violent nature.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Updates from my new Blog

If you want to comment...

As you might know, I have shifted my blog to Wordpress - here (click).

All the blog posts I had published before shifting have been transferred there, so if you want to comment on any of the blog posts on this blog, SIMPLY CLICK ON THE TITLE OF THE INDIVIDUAL POSTS.

Thank you!

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails
2012 55 words be damned 55-er 55-Fiction 55er Addiction Adverse possession affiliation Allah Allegory ambition Analogies Anticlimax Arrogance Ashley Tellis Atheism Atlas Shrugged Ayn Rand Ayodhya dispute Babri Mosque Barkha Dutt BJP Blogger Bloggers Blogs Bollywood Brain Bullosophy Career Challenge Child sexual abuse Christianity Commonwealth games 2010 Communalism Competition Conformism contentment Corruption Crappy technical words that just mean shit Cynicism Dark Death Deception Democracy Dreams Efficiency Ego Embezzlement English Ethics Ethics in Tangents Evolution Eyes Falsifiability Fantasy Favorites Fiction Flash fiction Force of habit Free will Freedom of expression Future Gail Waynand Galileo Gandhi family Giordano Bruno God Guest post Guilt Gujarati Heroes Hindi Hindu - the newspaper History Howard Roark Humor Hypocrisy Hypothesis idealism illusion Impulse Inflation Intelligence Internet IPC Islam Journalism Judiciary Language Lateral thinking Life Lot of links Love Madhu Koda Mail to blogger Majority Mass media Medical crap--not for human consumption Midas Mulligan mirage Mobile technology Morality Movies Music My blog Narendra Modi Natural selection Naturalism NDTV NewsX Nightmare no atheists in foxholes Nobel Prize Obama Obesity Objectivism Ophthalmology Oxytocin Parenting Parody pederasty People philosophy Poetry Political correctness Politics Poll Populism Practical objectivism Practicality Prejudice Price rise procrastination Protests Psychiatry Psychology Purpose of Life Quran Ram Gopal Varma Rationality Recommendations Religion Review Rhyme scarcity Science Secularism Serendipity Short post Short story Song parody Story Stubbornness Supernaturalism Survey Survival of fittest Technology Terrorism The Fountainhead Tragedy Trivia Twitter Un.atheism UPA violence Weight Why world is doomed Widgets Wikipedia

Search for Serendipity to happen!